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Fic: Save All Your Aggro Reducing Abilities [Stargate SG-1; Gen; G]
Holy Crap. This fic is entirely ![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
genaschuyler's fault and maybe partially ladynorbert's fault. If I discussed the lulz of Teal'c playing World of Warcraft with you, you had a hand in this.
Since this is set in S6 and I know for a fact that Warcraft didn't come out until approximately 2 years later the MMO is not named but you can fill in the blanks. Title is from this infamous Onyxia wipe animation.
Title: Save All Your Aggro Reducing Abilities
Author:sheikah
Word Count: 863
Fandom: Stargate SG-1
Rating: G
Pairings: Jack/Sam if you squint. I'd call it Gen.
Notes: Set during S6, so Jonas is present.
Jack wasn’t really sure how it started but he was damn sure it had something to do with Jonas. Daniel was weird, sure, but his nerding mostly stuck to old books and dusty artifacts. Jonas was a whole other beast; super-human intelligence and no social life meant he picked up new obsessions like most people picked up a six pack at the grocery store.
Jack thought maybe it’d be a good idea if Jonas drank more, honestly, because then he could finally make good on all those promises he kept making to the nurses down in the infirmary. But that was neither here nor there. What was both here and there was that team night at Jack’s house with steaks and beer and hockey had somehow turned into three laptops all hooked into some kooky game that Jonas had started, spread to Teal’c on their last round of downtime and conned Carter into during a moment of weakness.
And Jack didn’t get one stupid thing about it.
Oh he’d tried. He’d sat next to Teal’c and listened to him go over the merits of race and class and how the combat worked and about halfway through another lecture on why the base stats of druids made them more solid than…what was it? Priest? Mage? Jack didn’t remember. He just knew Teal’c was spending all his downtime watching some airy fairy elf run around in an imaginary world and it was just plain weird.
God, he missed Daniel. He missed Daniel so much, even if he was wearing sweaters leftover from Irish Spring commercials and just being plain unhelpful since he ascended. Daniel would never be doing this.
So Jack drank his beer sullenly and flipped channels on the tv while the three of them clicked away happily on their laptops, Carter occasionally emitting a sound of glee when she had a critical hit (and what the hell was that? Jack had regretted asking once he got Jonas and Carter going at him double time to explain that particular mechanic.)
“O’Neill. Something seems to be the matter.” Oh Teal’c. Jack could always count on the big guy being Captain Obvious, couldn’t he? Jack shook his head and waved it off, leaning in to watch two amateur hockey teams make a mockery of the sport on local television. He hated the NHL off-season, but what could he do? His team was raiding. They’d joined a guild.
“Oh, you know. Just invited my three best buddies over for a night of debauchery and I feel significantly not debauched,” Jack said dryly, trying not to be so sore about it. He downed more beer and got a delicately arched eyebrow for his troubles. Par for the course. He changed the channels rapidly, eyes scanning over each channel for a second or two before he passed it up for greener pastures. Infomercial, infomercial, basketball, porn…hey wait, when’d he get that channel? Mmm. Not so bad. Remember that one for later.
He settled for some movie, acting pathetic and plot thin. The lead was a gorgeous, leggy blonde and Jack was mostly okay with that. He had a type, after all, and the movie entertained him decently enough until he heard a loud curse from Carter and a groan from Jonas. He looked up and even Teal’c had a grimace.
“Let me guess…dragon took you out?” Carter glared; Jack had always liked that glare when she used it on other people. It made her look kinda formidable and he always grinned at that. He refrained at the moment, figuring her annoyance had just hit Defcon 3. No sense in making things worse.
“We wiped, sir, because the tank couldn’t hold aggro.”
Jack made the mistake of asking what aggro was. He’d never make that mistake again, not after Carter’s explanation of generating threat and percentages and aggro-reducing abilities and Jack didn’t get shit from it except it meant that the priest (druid--druid, Teal’c played a druid) died and they all died because he (she? Teal’c played a girl, he’d seen it) died. Right.
Jack had enough. It happened from time to time.
So it wasn’t that much effort to stand up, rip the jerry-rigged networking cords from the three laptops, close them and put them in an unwieldy little stack next to his front door. Right next to his muddy boots. Let them sit for a while.
“I’ve put up with it long enough. It was cute at first, especially on you, Carter,” Jack started, getting an indignant little frown and a blush from the major, “But it’s gotta stop. Real people, real company, and hey, I’m kinda bored. I miss when we played cards and stuff, you know?”
The three of them traded looks, Teal’c’s face a mask and Jonas with surprise and half-fright and Carter with just annoyance.
“Fine, sir, but you really should look into purchasing the game. I, for one, think you’d make an excellent paladin. And we do need another tank now that we just kicked the one that wiped us.”
Jack gave her an eyebrow of his own.
“Over my dead body, Major. Entertain me.”
And so they did.
genaschuyler's fault and maybe partially ladynorbert's fault. If I discussed the lulz of Teal'c playing World of Warcraft with you, you had a hand in this.Since this is set in S6 and I know for a fact that Warcraft didn't come out until approximately 2 years later the MMO is not named but you can fill in the blanks. Title is from this infamous Onyxia wipe animation.
Title: Save All Your Aggro Reducing Abilities
Author:
sheikahWord Count: 863
Fandom: Stargate SG-1
Rating: G
Pairings: Jack/Sam if you squint. I'd call it Gen.
Notes: Set during S6, so Jonas is present.
Jack wasn’t really sure how it started but he was damn sure it had something to do with Jonas. Daniel was weird, sure, but his nerding mostly stuck to old books and dusty artifacts. Jonas was a whole other beast; super-human intelligence and no social life meant he picked up new obsessions like most people picked up a six pack at the grocery store.
Jack thought maybe it’d be a good idea if Jonas drank more, honestly, because then he could finally make good on all those promises he kept making to the nurses down in the infirmary. But that was neither here nor there. What was both here and there was that team night at Jack’s house with steaks and beer and hockey had somehow turned into three laptops all hooked into some kooky game that Jonas had started, spread to Teal’c on their last round of downtime and conned Carter into during a moment of weakness.
And Jack didn’t get one stupid thing about it.
Oh he’d tried. He’d sat next to Teal’c and listened to him go over the merits of race and class and how the combat worked and about halfway through another lecture on why the base stats of druids made them more solid than…what was it? Priest? Mage? Jack didn’t remember. He just knew Teal’c was spending all his downtime watching some airy fairy elf run around in an imaginary world and it was just plain weird.
God, he missed Daniel. He missed Daniel so much, even if he was wearing sweaters leftover from Irish Spring commercials and just being plain unhelpful since he ascended. Daniel would never be doing this.
So Jack drank his beer sullenly and flipped channels on the tv while the three of them clicked away happily on their laptops, Carter occasionally emitting a sound of glee when she had a critical hit (and what the hell was that? Jack had regretted asking once he got Jonas and Carter going at him double time to explain that particular mechanic.)
“O’Neill. Something seems to be the matter.” Oh Teal’c. Jack could always count on the big guy being Captain Obvious, couldn’t he? Jack shook his head and waved it off, leaning in to watch two amateur hockey teams make a mockery of the sport on local television. He hated the NHL off-season, but what could he do? His team was raiding. They’d joined a guild.
“Oh, you know. Just invited my three best buddies over for a night of debauchery and I feel significantly not debauched,” Jack said dryly, trying not to be so sore about it. He downed more beer and got a delicately arched eyebrow for his troubles. Par for the course. He changed the channels rapidly, eyes scanning over each channel for a second or two before he passed it up for greener pastures. Infomercial, infomercial, basketball, porn…hey wait, when’d he get that channel? Mmm. Not so bad. Remember that one for later.
He settled for some movie, acting pathetic and plot thin. The lead was a gorgeous, leggy blonde and Jack was mostly okay with that. He had a type, after all, and the movie entertained him decently enough until he heard a loud curse from Carter and a groan from Jonas. He looked up and even Teal’c had a grimace.
“Let me guess…dragon took you out?” Carter glared; Jack had always liked that glare when she used it on other people. It made her look kinda formidable and he always grinned at that. He refrained at the moment, figuring her annoyance had just hit Defcon 3. No sense in making things worse.
“We wiped, sir, because the tank couldn’t hold aggro.”
Jack made the mistake of asking what aggro was. He’d never make that mistake again, not after Carter’s explanation of generating threat and percentages and aggro-reducing abilities and Jack didn’t get shit from it except it meant that the priest (druid--druid, Teal’c played a druid) died and they all died because he (she? Teal’c played a girl, he’d seen it) died. Right.
Jack had enough. It happened from time to time.
So it wasn’t that much effort to stand up, rip the jerry-rigged networking cords from the three laptops, close them and put them in an unwieldy little stack next to his front door. Right next to his muddy boots. Let them sit for a while.
“I’ve put up with it long enough. It was cute at first, especially on you, Carter,” Jack started, getting an indignant little frown and a blush from the major, “But it’s gotta stop. Real people, real company, and hey, I’m kinda bored. I miss when we played cards and stuff, you know?”
The three of them traded looks, Teal’c’s face a mask and Jonas with surprise and half-fright and Carter with just annoyance.
“Fine, sir, but you really should look into purchasing the game. I, for one, think you’d make an excellent paladin. And we do need another tank now that we just kicked the one that wiped us.”
Jack gave her an eyebrow of his own.
“Over my dead body, Major. Entertain me.”
And so they did.
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Now Bill Lee has to come over and join in and then Jack really WILL be fed up.
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